L. A. F. S (Love At First Sight)

Do you believe in love at first sight?

I do,  if I’m wearing my glasses

When I saw her it was love at first sight

doubt by the second

but cruel bitches do not deserve a third glance

so I don’t look in mirrors any more

not until I’ve manned up, refurbished my ego

stripped the self pity and re-laid the entrance to my heart in carpet red

this only has access to stars from now on

one star:


Dear distant beloved betrothed to heartache

I might be a technophobe who prefers Apples and Blackberries to be fruits;

handwritten notes to hurried texts

 and common sense to Google searches

but I’m praying every night that Steve Jobs comes back from the dead

to unveil one more world changing invention:

a time machine

so I can return back to the moment when our eyes first met

 forget regret and just accept

that it was…LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT…

instead of this teeth grinding love in hindsight

… but then I guess… they’d…need to invent…the time machine…to bring back…Steve…to invent the…

Oh woman can’t you see the mess I’m in without you?!

Love is a business deal dear one

look at my wrists I’ve taken my cuts

but I’m a capitalist when it comes to love; can never get enough

faults, farts, warts and all…

well maybe not the gonorrhoea …

but for either of us no one else there is  so let’s go back

 We climbed Kilimanjaro every night, the peak of climax, but we couldn’t stand the return trip down

and since love is now digitized

we don’t know how to deal with negatives;

you get the picture

fully developed

in a flash

over before you know it, things move too fast…

instant gratification was never my cup of chocolat chaud with hazelnut syrup and cream

Topped by nothing is the perceptive power of women

you said you could always read me like your favourite book

and pretty quickly that changed

from Gone With the Wind

to Roald Dahl’s The Twits

but we can make this work again

it can be a, what do they call it? an “open relationship”

the four of you and the two of I


 I couldn’t see the signs of love back then

because I didn’t know whose eyes I was looking through

my friend’s eyes

my realist or my idealist eyes

my japs eye?

Can we try again now I know “I love you” is not a female favourite euphemism for “don’t just stand there you prick”

and that though you may play hard to get, a slap in the face does not mean you are amazed by my time management?

I know this is hurting you more than it hurts me

and that is what hurts the most

so I take shelter

in reminiscence of the first time I made you smile

a glory far too good to move on from

but I’m going to get a parking ticket if I stay here in memory lane

God, please strike me with amnesia so I can reverse to the beginning of the road

adjust my rear view

and re-introduce myself in a moment of déjà-vu

Broken hearts mend with humour

so let’s have some L.A.F.S

Love At First Sight

Dasein Petals © Copyright 2013



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